


Meeting The Kanes

by GayGothicFanboy



Category: Archer (Cartoon)
Genre: Attempted Kidnapping, F/F, Katya saves AJ, Kidnapping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:20:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23993665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GayGothicFanboy/pseuds/GayGothicFanboy
Summary: Katya shouldn't be nervous of meeting Lana's parents--why the hell is she so scared?
Relationships: Lana Kane/Katya Kazanova
Kudos: 3





	Meeting The Kanes

They sat in the parked car.

"Are you excited?" Lana asked her girlfriend.

Katya whimpered, "What if they don't like me?"

Lana rolled her eyes. "Baby, for the last time, they'll love you!"

Five year old, AJ laughed from the back seat. "Mommy and Katya sitting in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g!"

Katya noted, "At least she knows how to spell kissing."

Lana slightly laughed. "Yeah. That's true." Lana turned to gaze deeply into Katya's red eyes. "Are you ready?"

Katya took a deep breath. "Yeah. I guess I'm as ready as I'll ever be."

The three exited the car and approached the door of the Kane household.

Lana knocked on the door.

Katya stood awkwardly behind her girlfriend.

Lana's mother, Claudette, answered the door. "Hello!" She smiled. Then she called out into the house, "Lemuel! Lana and Abbiejean are here!" Claudette turned back to Lana. "Come in!" She beckoned.

The three stepped inside.

Claudette shut the door behind them.

Lemuel stepped into the room. "Who's that?" He pointed at Katya.

"Mom. Dad," Lana began. "Remember how I said I'd be bring someone else along?"

Claudette smiled. She said, "You must be Lana's friend!"

Lana rubbed the back of her head. "Well...sort of."

Lemuel raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean 'sort of'?"

"Katya, these are my parents." Lana turned back to face her parents. "Mom. Dad. This is Katya Kazanova. My _girlfriend_."

"What was that? I could have sworn you said _girlfriend,"_ Lemuel stated.

"I did," Lana told him. "Katya and I have been dating for a year."

Lemuel muttered, "Where did we go wrong..?"

Lana glared at her father.

Lemuel immediately disgusted. "Claudette, may I speak to you alone for a bit?"

Claudette nodded. "Certainly."

The two turned around.

Lemuel whispered, "I don't know about this."

"What?" Claudette asked quietly.

"I mean this whole thing about Lana having a girlfriend. And a Russian tramp for the matter," Lemuel quietly stated his opinion.

"Uh guys?" Lana's call brang Claudette and Lemuel back to reality.

They turned back around.

Claudette tried to be nice. "So, Katya, what do you do for a living?"

Katya told her, "I'm the head of the KGB."

Claudette gave Lana the glance of 'is she serious? Are you seriously screwing the head of the KGB?'.

Lana nodded. "Yup. It's true."

Claudette then asked another question. "What do your parents do for a living?"

Katya slightly wince.

Claudette asked, "Is that a touchy subject? I am sorry."

Katya shook her head. "It's okay. My mother is dead. And my father is prison for life for killing my mother."

Lana's parents exchanged glances.

Lemuel looked Katya up and down. "What are you?"

"Huh?" Katya seemed caught off guard by the question.

Lemuel said, "Your eyes seem almost cybernetic."

"That's because they are," Lana said, dryly.

Lemuel looked confused. The same could be said for Claudette.

"Cyborg," Lana and Katya said in unison.

Lemuel adjusted his glasses. "And Lana you're okay with this machine around Abbiejean? It could be a danger to AJ if it's always around her."

"Bozhe moy!" Katya gasped.

"Dad!" Lana yelled. "What the hell?!"

"It's not like it feels things," Lemuel said.

Lana angrily grunted, " **She** does feel things!"

Claudette butted in, "Where is AJ?"

-

They had frantically searched the house.

The security cameras showed a van picking AJ up.

Lana had started panicking. "What are we going to do?"

Katya tried to calm her girlfriend down. "It's okay. We'll go after her."

-

"Does everyone have their seat belts on?" Katya asked.

"Yes."

"Good." Katya hit the gas peddle extremely hard.

They sped down the street.

In a matter of no time, they caught up with the kidnappers.

The kidnappers tried to shoot them.

Katya said, "Lana, take the wheel."

"On it," Lana confirmed.

Katya unbuckled her seat belt and jumped out of convertible. She landed on the roof of the kidnappers' car.

The kidnappers tried shooting at her. They actually hit her a lot.

But that didn't affect her-- after all, she was a cyborg.

Katya ripped the roof off the car. She leaned in and saved AJ. She leaped onto the road. Standing, up she made sure Abbiejean was okay.

The kidnappers swerved off the side into a deep river by the road.

The Kanes' car came to a halt.

Lana, Lemuel, and Claudette all came running.

Katya handed AJ off to Lana.

Claudette smiled. "That was heroic! So very heroic. You saved our grandchild." She cleared her throat. "I believe I should say this, welcome to the family Katya."

Lemuel looked Katya in the eye with a piercing gaze. Then the gaze soften. "Since there's still time, would you like to watch the football game with us?"

Katya's eyes grew wide. "Would I!"

Katya had been accepted into the Kane family; and that's all she really wanted.


End file.
